I am me , therefore I AM. Nothing is more precious than my presence/being.

Today Vidani managed to dismantle the little home calculator. I was shocked, because it was the first time, it was falling apart in front of my

eyes. Usually we get so many cheap variations, that we just go and buy a new one. *This calcy, when we are working, becomes our Jaan and we can’t do with/out it .

Oftentimes, it’s the window, which loses colour; these days just as the cheaper cell phones, it’s the buttons that betray.

Pehle we had those calculator repairing shops, where instead of paying for a new calcy, we would get it fixed with this technician. This inheritance is lost.

Now its more Chinese calcy’s available than ever before. There’s more money In the world. We print more? EM?

Smaller things keep losing value. 1 Paisa? Did you see those round aluminium stars with dancing edges?

What are the things that have lost value?

So the good calcy had only 5 component parts. Out of which the front and back cover were just large and empty as such. The stuff that calcy works on were a rubber number pad, a display window glass with a magnetic strip and an electronic chip plate.

Pehle whenever a TV Repair man would come home I would be gaping at the insides, wanting to know more of its components.

The large circuitry would make me exclaim, it looks like a neighbourhood model. There are roads and buildings of various kinds, it looked like a city to me. At that point I would lose interest; often putting the bechara techinician feeling uncomfy about my wonder and exclamations.            

So many people are not not used to absorbing an expression of wonder in an open environment. Most hate it. Several people think I am childish; or childlike in that sense, and I have gone past caring or bothering now. I do not think Iam repairable today, pertaining my childish wonder of things.../ and people.

just being a bit of an over expressor than others. Actually it is irksome to me, to be honest; that I cannot follow your rules about how an adult should behave. Iam somewhat past it.. or mostly  getting there..

I love being me.

There was a time , I AFFIRMED TO myself; I am larger than life and I love it. If you have problem with it; please respect me enough to not criticize me constantly, kindly walk out on me…….coz…….

I want myself to let me be me!  I ain’t here having one life conforming to norms; simply because I enjoy Rains so much and have the absolute inherent capacity to express my joy & delight of it, perhaps more than you.

Yea.. so the electronic chip plate has 2 capacitors, 1 large polka dot which holds the convergence of all pathways, a battery; one capacitor has a red clay potli .. ! ; the ends where the pathways go are through and through hollows, there’s a large point of contact piano. The window mainly remits light. ? .. similar is a remote? ..  !. .. ..

And so on some more notes go on …..

And I am sitting by my window and wondering, indeed, what is it that loses value? What is hold - worthy and .. what is … worth letting go ?...

I affirm again, I AM , let me be so comfortable with myself; that hopefully other’s opinions do not matter to me. Let me be not shallow. Let nobody’s heart in the uni be shallow … … ,it may be the only gift we truly have.  

I look towards Vidani, he nods like the brimful of asha on the 45 .. ! .. it’s a brimful of asha on the 45..!